Humans are mobile creatures. We feel most confident and fulfilled if we are moving forward and making progress. How do you feel when you are stuck in a traffic jam. I used to live in Mexico City where you could sit for 30 minutes without moving. You feel impotent, frustrated, and depressed. Confidence comes through moving forward and growing. This is how you do it.
1) Do one thing that terrifies you every day
Fear is often good because it keeps you alive. Your brain is hardwired for self-preservation, Fear of crossing a busy highway is a good thing. But sometimes fear makes you small, timid, and powerless. For example, fear of rejection may keep you single when you want to be in a relationship. By confronting your fears, you become brave. So, go and speak to that pretty girl or attractive boy in the supermarket, and agree to that public speaking engagement. Take yourself out of your comfort zone and watch how you grow.
2) Be kind to yourself
Have you ever noticed that when you read reviews, you always focus on that one negative review? The human brain is hardwired to put more importance on the negative than the positive. That is why there is more bad news out there and why we complain more than we praise. The same is true about how we see ourselves. Don't let that negative voice in your brain put you down. Keep a journal -keep a note of your strengths and daily victories (no matter how small).
3) Set small attainable goals
The reason why new years resolutions never last longer than a week is because they are big and unattainable. For example, go to the gym every day for the next year. When you stop after a week, you feel like a loser. Set small daily or weekly goals like spending 5 minutes meditating each day, or drink more water, or eating less sugar. These small changes you make will compound over time and make you feel more successful and self-controlled.
4) Be kind to a stranger
Help someone else. Studies have shown that doing things for other people makes you happy. It can be as simple as opening the door for an old lady or as involved as volunteering at a local charity. This act forces you to focus less on your limitations and anxieties, and more on the needs of others. Making a positive impact on the life of someone else is extremely self-empowering.
5) Accept your weaknesses and make them small
If you are 5 feet 2 inches, it is unlikely you will ever be a great basketball player. So what? People may tease you and make fun of you. If you have accepted your natural limitations, you have disarmed your bullies. School teaches you to work on your weaknesses. A better approach is to maximize your strengths and accept your weaknesses. Life is hard enough as it is. This will make life a little easier. Define yourself by your strengths - not your weaknesses.
6) Don't be envious
Envy fuels a lot of what is posted on social media. Everyone wants to show how great their lives are. How much fun they are having, how successful they are, how happy they are, and how cool their lives are. People looking at this then quickly compare their own lives and come to the conclusion they suck. Be aware that the bulk of what you see is fake. That cool mansion - the guy posting it is probably the pool guy, that Ferrari is being hired for the day, that cool vacation to Bali was paid for by their grandmother and she is renting a room with 9 friends. You never know the full story of the person with whom you are comparing yourself.
7) Take care of yourself physically
Get regular exercise, eat healthy foods, get a haircut every 3 weeks, wash your face, and dress well. All these external physical things will automatically make you feel more confident.
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