In the last 2 years of my life I have come to the realization that many of the things I once believed to be true were in fact completely false. Here are 8 lessons I have learned.
Lesson 1: Success is not Fulfillment
A Harvard study showed the most fulfilled and happy people were not the most successful. The people who felt the strongest human connection to their community, their friends and families felt the most fulfilled.
Lesson 2: Give More than You Take
The Bible says it is more blessed to give than to receive. How true is that? It feels awesome to give stuff away. In my opinion, the act of giving is a commercial transaction. I give and in return I feel awesome. Puritanical cretins will tell you true giving has to be selfless - they can fuck off!
Lesson 3: Guilt is a Strong Motivator
I grew up in the 1980s in apartheid South Africa. South Africa was a pariah state. Before 1994, racism was legal. Most white South Africans growing up in my generation carry the guilt of enjoying the fruits of apartheid and not taking a stance against it. In private, we expressed our outrage but never in such a way to jeopardize our privileged position. When I returned to South Africa after living abroad for twenty years, I was overcome by the inequality that still exists. This inspired me to find ways to give back.
Lesson 4: Money Shouldn't be Your Why
Financial freedom requires changing your relationship with money. When you work for money, money becomes your master. It rules your mind, your actions, and your desires. When money works for you, you are flipping that relationship. You are now the master. You are in control. Money works for you and you in turn work for a higher purpose. You need to find that higher purpose. It could be to provide for your family or give back to your community or your country. It could be to free up your time to pursue what you find meaningful. In addition, you want to do business with people that share your values. If money is your why, it will become an endless source of anxiety. You will never have enough.
Lesson 5: Don’t Focus on Your Weaknesses
School teaches you to focus on your weaknesses. This was good advice. If the thought of algebra forced you into a state of temporary cerebral numbness, you were not going to graduate from high school (at least where I went to school in South Africa). But you are no longer in school. This is life and life is all about maximizing your talents and to hell with your weaknesses. If your father wanted you to be a doctor, but you wanted to be a poet, and you took the route proposed by your father, you have spent all your adult life focusing on your weaknesses. You have taken the path of greatest resistance and life has been an uphill battle.
Lesson 6: Enthusiasm is Your Secret Weapon
Ralph Waldo Emerson, said: "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." Who doesn't love being around enthusiastic and energetic people? You tap into their energy. You want to be around them and you want to do business with them. You can feel enthusiasm by the way a person talks, walks or shakes hands. The greatest thing about enthusiasm is that you don’t need to be borne with it. Some people are naturally enthusiastic, but if not, it is a trait you can grow and cultivate.
Lesson 7: Stand up Straight
Standing up straight with your shoulders back.
Jordan B. Peterson from 12 Rules for Life
Animals exert their dominance by making themselves larger as a sign of strength. Jack Schwager, in his book "Stock Market Wizards: Interviews with America's Top Stock Traders" takes a detour and interviews Dr. Ari Kiev. He mentions in the interview that he can see when a trader is losing money simply by looking at his body language. If a trader was hunched over his desk it typically meant that he was losing. If he was propped upright or standing and walking around, it was an indication that he was winning. In the same way that posture is a reflection of performance, performance can also be a reflection of posture.
Lesson 8: Don’t be Envious
Don't compare yourself to someone else or try and be someone else. Jordan Peterson suggests that you should compare yourself today with who you were yesterday and focus on small incremental changes. Set numerous small achievable goals. A fraction of a percent changed every day, compounded over many months and years will yield outstanding results. Envy is an illusion you have created in your imagination. The people you envy are not as successful as you think.
#lifecoach #motivation #lifecoaching #coaching #love #mindset #coach #inspiration #selflove #life #success #selfcare #lifestyle #mentalhealth #mindfulness #personaldevelopment #entrepreneur #goals #happiness #meditation #loveyourself #healing #motivationalquotes #lifequotes #positivevibes #fitness #businesscoach #motivationalspeaker #business
Comments