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  • Are Men Hypocrites When It Comes to Women?

    Do men say one thing but want another, acting on the latter impulse instead? Is there a massive disconnect between what we say and what we do? I'm starting to believe there is, and this might be leading women to change their objectives and game plans to cater to this divergence. This shift in women's behavior is problematic for many reasons. The Dubai Dilemma Let's take Dubai, a city awash with cash, where policemen drive Italian sports cars, roads are metaphorically paved with gold, and the economy is buoyed by oil money, creating a playground for billionaires. In this city, women can thrive if they're young, attractive, creative, and ambitious. They set up Instagram accounts, showcase themselves at luxurious pools, and receive a deluge of direct messages from wealthy men eager to take them on exotic dates, showering them with expensive handbags and jewelry in exchange for physical intimacy. This lifestyle offers easy money and an easier life. Why slog through university, work 80-hour weeks at a corporate job for 15 years in hopes of reaching the C-suite when you can live large now? Dubai is an extreme example, but it illustrates a broader point: Men reward available, attractive, and provocative women. The Real Cost of Superficial Rewards The women with breast augmentations and tattoos overshadow those with strong values—the ones you might want to take home to mom. Men buy fancy gifts for their hot girlfriends while ignoring their wives, who dedicate themselves to raising children and maintaining a stable household. We claim to desire women of substance, character, and independence—partners who will have our backs and help grow our businesses. Women who can host a dinner for business partners at a beautifully decorated home they keep running smoothly. But at the end of the day, who has all the fun? Is it 20-year-old Whitney, the swimsuit model flying first class to watch the Monaco Grand Prix on a private yacht, or Carol, the senior partner at a corporate law firm earning seven figures a year? Who Is to Blame? Men are to blame. Men incentivize women into behavior detrimental to their long-term happiness and our own. The superficial rewards we offer—fancy gifts, exotic trips—encourage women to prioritize looks over developing other aspects of their personality. When these women age and their looks fade, the attention from wealthy men wanes. Without the need to develop other parts of their personality, they find their world becoming small and dull. The Long-Term Impact This cycle is harmful to both men and women. Men end up in relationships with partners who don't meet their deeper needs, leading to dissatisfaction and potential infidelity. Women, on the other hand, miss out on developing fulfilling careers and personal growth, relying solely on their looks. This reliance is a ticking time bomb, set to explode when youth fades and interest diminishes. Breaking the Cycle To break this cycle, men need to align their actions with their words. If we truly value women of substance, we should reward those qualities. We need to appreciate the women who support us, build us up, and stand by our side through thick and thin. We must stop incentivizing superficial attributes and start valuing the qualities that lead to lasting happiness and fulfillment. By doing so, we can encourage women to focus on their personal and professional development, leading to healthier, more satisfying relationships for both parties. Only then can we bridge the gap between what we say we want and what we actually pursue. #SizeMatters   #EvolutionaryBiology   #DatingTips   #HunterGatherer   #SweetTooth   #ScarcityMindset   #RejectionFears   #Hypergamy   #HeightAdvantage   #PositiveMasculinity   #ModernDating   #FitnessGoals   #ConfidenceBoost   #CavemanInstincts   #SurvivalOfTheFittest   #GymLife   #StrengthAndConfidence   #MalePhysicality   #DatingAdvice   #MenVsWomen

  • The Single Best Green Flag When Vetting a Woman: Her Relationship with Her Father

    When it comes to choosing a woman to let into your life, there is one paramount green flag you should pay attention to: her relationship with her father. This relationship can reveal a lot about her character, values, and how she may interact with you. Let's break this down into three categories: the good, the bad, and the ugly. The Good Relationship A woman with a good relationship with her father has a solid foundation for a healthy partnership. This relationship is characterized by openness, honesty, and mutual respect. She recognizes her father's authority, while he respects her autonomy and independence. He sees her as his little girl, but also understands it's time for her to find a partner. A father who has faith in his parenting skills knows he has equipped his daughter with the necessary tools to navigate the world. She feels loved and protected, has a strong sense of self, and knows her own value. She respects her father, listens to his counsel, and seeks his approval, which has always been given freely. If this is the relationship she has with her father, it serves as a blueprint for how she will engage in her relationship with you. This is a solid foundation on which to build a healthy, lasting partnership. The Bad Relationship The bad relationship often stems from an absent father. This could mean he left when she was young or was a shadowy figure who wielded no authority in the household. In such cases, the mother typically steps in as the provider, protector, and enforcer of order. Without a strong father figure, the woman has no point of reference for healthy male relationships. Her interactions with men have likely been dysfunctional, leading her to believe that men cannot be trusted or relied upon. She has had to take on responsibilities herself, making it difficult for her to rely on you. This might manifest as avoidant and unavailable behavior in the relationship. The Ugly Relationship The ugly relationship is one marked by a bad, often toxic, dynamic with her father. Some women go through life without ever having a positive experience with a man. Every interaction has been a source of stress and anxiety, leading to continuous drama and baggage that she carries into every new relationship. For a man, entering a relationship with a woman who has had a consistently negative relationship with her father can be challenging. This is a massive red flag, as her unresolved issues will inevitably spill over, creating an unhappy and unstable environment. Conclusion Understanding a woman's relationship with her father can provide deep insights into how she will navigate a partnership with you. A good relationship indicates a strong foundation for mutual respect and love. A bad relationship suggests potential challenges in trust and reliance. An ugly relationship warns of deep-seated issues that could create significant turmoil. When vetting a woman for a serious relationship, pay close attention to this dynamic. It could be the single most important factor in predicting the future health and happiness of your relationship. #SizeMatters   #EvolutionaryBiology   #DatingTips   #HunterGatherer   #SweetTooth   #ScarcityMindset   #RejectionFears   #Hypergamy   #HeightAdvantage   #PositiveMasculinity   #ModernDating   #FitnessGoals   #ConfidenceBoost   #CavemanInstincts   #SurvivalOfTheFittest   #GymLife   #StrengthAndConfidence   #MalePhysicality   #DatingAdvice   #MenVsWomen

  • Rediscovering Traditional Masculine Strength: A Call to Action for Modern Men

    Men who are physically weak are no good to anyone. This might sound harsh, but it’s a call to action. It's time to go back to traditional masculine roles and understand the true purpose of a man on this planet. From an evolutionary standpoint, we are here to propagate the species. That's a given. But what else are men here to do? We are here to protect, defend, and lift heavy stuff. Men were placed on this planet to do hard things. The Role of Men: A Historical Perspective Looking back to our hunter-gatherer forebears, men had to hunt animals, survive in the wild, and defend their tribes. If our ancestors could see us now, they would be horrified at how we have atrophied over the centuries. Today, many men lead sedentary lives with limited physical exertion. Our bodies were made to wrestle saber-toothed tigers, not to sit in front of video screens typing on keyboards or playing video games. Modern Challenges and the Loss of Physicality I understand that it's difficult to replicate the wildness of our ancestors' existence. Few people have the means or skills to live in the wilderness, and such isolation isn't healthy for anyone. Ideally, we could find a group of like-minded individuals to set up a community in the wild, but that's a topic for another day. The reality is that men need to get physically strong. We need to hit the gym and put on muscle. We need to learn how to engage other humans in hostile environments and how to defend ourselves. The Importance of Physical Strength and Competence Imagine a scenario where a madman breaks through your front door at 3 am and threatens your family's safety. Do you have the ability to defend those close to you? Can you work with your hands? Can you replace a flat tire or fix a leaky pipe? These are basic masculine skills we need to regain. Can you make a fire, cook, or survive for two weeks if your partner went away on business? Many men have lost these basic survival skills. Why Men Need to Reclaim Their Masculine Roles So why should men do all these things? It's simple: these are basic masculine jobs. Men need to be useful to others. It's the cornerstone of our purpose and existence. Unfortunately, everything in society is pulling us away from these roles. Our masculinity is often labeled as toxic. Simple competence is now seen as negative. Being aggressive is considered bad. Really? When that madman breaks through your door at 3 am, maybe a little aggression is exactly what's called for. When the army of a rival nation crosses your border and threatens the sovereignty of your country, maybe a little violence is exactly what's called for. The Need for Strong Men in Society Women want strong men. Women need strong men who can protect them. Women don't need feminized men who want to talk about their feelings and get in touch with their feminine side. Women want men of action. Don't listen to extreme feminist rhetoric that says women need men like a fish needs a bicycle. Sure, women can survive without men, but the combination of a masculine man and a feminine woman is powerful and effective. Both sides operating in their natural energy is a thing to behold. Conclusion: A Call to Action It's time for men to step up and reclaim their traditional masculine roles. We need to get physically strong, learn essential survival skills, and be ready to defend and protect our loved ones. By doing so, we can rediscover our true purpose and live fulfilling lives. Let's embrace our masculinity and become the men we were meant to be. #SizeMatters   #EvolutionaryBiology   #DatingTips   #HunterGatherer   #SweetTooth   #ScarcityMindset   #RejectionFears   #Hypergamy   #HeightAdvantage   #PositiveMasculinity   #ModernDating   #FitnessGoals   #ConfidenceBoost   #CavemanInstincts   #SurvivalOfTheFittest   #GymLife   #StrengthAndConfidence   #MalePhysicality   #DatingAdvice   #MenVsWomen

  • The Unspoken Truth: Why Sex Matters in a Relationship

    Is sex in a relationship important? Consider the myriad of relationships you maintain in your life. With friends, family, employees, bosses—each is founded on core tenets and values: honesty, communication, integrity, mutual respect, compromise, shared experiences, and shared values. These same principles are present in your romantic relationship. However, there is one distinct activity that sets your romantic partnership apart from all other relationships: sex. The Unique Bond of Sexual Intimacy Sex is the single, defining feature of a romantic relationship. This uniqueness underscores its importance. Without sex, the relationship with your romantic partner would resemble every other relationship you have. The presence of sex is what elevates this bond, making it more intimate and exclusive. The Male Perspective on Sexual Importance Women often express outrage when men emphasize the importance of sex. To understand this, let’s consider Freud's assertion: man's primary driver is desire. If you were to neuter a man, you wouldn't just eliminate his sexual desire; you'd nullify a significant portion of his motivational drive. By using sex as a weapon and denying it, women inadvertently perform an act akin to psychological castration. This sheds light on why men are so vocal about the significance of sex. The Weaponization of Sex When women use sex as leverage, they may not realize the profound impact it has on their partners. For men, sexual intimacy is a major motivational force. Depriving them of this not only affects their libido but also their overall drive and sense of self. It’s akin to visiting an Argentinian steakhouse and being shocked that they don't offer vegan tofu salads—misunderstanding the fundamental essence of the environment. Bridging the Understanding Gap Women need to recognize and understand the critical role that sex plays in their partner's life. It is not just a physical act; it is an emotional and psychological cornerstone. This acknowledgment can lead to deeper empathy and stronger relationships. Conclusion Sex in a relationship is more than a physical connection—it is a vital aspect that differentiates and elevates the bond between romantic partners. Understanding its importance from a male perspective can foster greater mutual respect and intimacy. It’s time to have open, honest conversations about the role of sex in relationships and appreciate its significance in maintaining a healthy, motivated, and fulfilling partnership. #SizeMatters   #EvolutionaryBiology   #DatingTips   #HunterGatherer   #SweetTooth   #ScarcityMindset   #RejectionFears   #Hypergamy   #HeightAdvantage   #PositiveMasculinity   #ModernDating   #FitnessGoals   #ConfidenceBoost   #CavemanInstincts   #SurvivalOfTheFittest   #GymLife   #StrengthAndConfidence   #MalePhysicality   #DatingAdvice   #MenVsWomen

  • The Cycle of Revolutions: Finding Balance After the Extremes

    History has shown us that revolutions, by their very nature, tend to swing to extremes before settling into a more balanced state. This pattern is evident in many significant upheavals throughout history. Consider the French Revolution, which began with noble goals of liberty and equality but quickly descended into a Reign of Terror. The revolutionaries, in their bid to maximize power, resorted to mass executions and draconian measures. Robespierre, a key figure in the revolution, met a violent end, marking a transition to a more moderate phase that eventually paved the way for Napoleon Bonaparte's rise. Similarly, the Bolshevik Revolution, led by Lenin, sought to dismantle the existing social and political structures, resulting in a brutal civil war and the establishment of a totalitarian state under Stalin. Over time, the Soviet Union experienced phases of de-Stalinization and attempts at reform, such as under Khrushchev and Gorbachev, leading ultimately to its dissolution and a move towards a more mixed economy. These examples illustrate a common pattern where revolutions start with radical changes that often lead to instability and excesses. Over time, however, counter-movements or reforms tend to bring societies back towards a more balanced outcome. The Feminist Revolution: A Modern-Day Success? Arguably one of the most successful revolutions in modern times is the feminist revolution. To understand its success, one only needs to compare the position of women in the 1950s to their status today in the United States. The image of the happy housewife living behind a white picket fence did a great job of concealing the limited opportunities available to women. Although there is still work to be done, the position of women in the modern world has greatly improved. Women now outnumber men in university graduations and often choose to delay starting a family in favor of their careers. However, in entering the job market, women have often been forced to adopt traditionally male and masculine traits. Alongside this progress, we are now hearing more about toxic femininity, much like the earlier discussions of toxic masculinity. It raises the question: has the feminist revolution gone too far? Have some feminists moved beyond the quest for equality to a quest for power, subtly creating a "reign of terror" where men are being feminized and castrated? The Backlash Against Masculinity In the past five years, can you think of a single Disney cartoon featuring a strong male character? Many portray men as bumbling idiots while strong female characters take the lead. While it is great to see strong women represented, it often comes at the expense of men. Hollywood frequently depicts men as one-dimensional fools who stumble along and try to stay out of the way of leading women. This backlash against the male hierarchy is understandable, but extremes are not optimal. Castrated and feminized men are not good for society, women, or men. So, what is the solution? Should men roll over and play the victim card? Absolutely not. Men need to be aware of this attack on their masculinity and fight back by being better, stronger, and more masculine. Embracing Masculinity in a Modern World Men need to seek out hard things, make themselves useful so that people depend on them, protect and care for those close to them, and be confident and courageous in a world that encourages conformity. This uphill struggle is essential for preserving masculinity. Pesticides in our food and hormones in our water also work to feminize men. This is not a conspiracy theory but a reality of modern life in a highly populated world where food security for billions cannot be achieved if all farming were organic. Conclusion: Finding Balance Like all revolutions, the feminist movement has brought about significant positive changes. However, it is crucial to find a balance that does not diminish the role of men. Men need to rise to the challenge, embracing their masculinity and contributing positively to society. Only by recognizing and addressing these challenges can we move towards a more balanced and equitable future. #SizeMatters   #EvolutionaryBiology   #DatingTips   #HunterGatherer   #SweetTooth   #ScarcityMindset   #RejectionFears   #Hypergamy   #HeightAdvantage   #PositiveMasculinity   #ModernDating   #FitnessGoals   #ConfidenceBoost   #CavemanInstincts   #SurvivalOfTheFittest   #GymLife   #StrengthAndConfidence   #MalePhysicality   #DatingAdvice   #MenVsWomen

  • The Cornerstone of Society: Relationships and Reproduction

    What do you think is the cornerstone of society and human existence? It's so fundamental to our survival as a species that its decline is putting our very existence in jeopardy. We're witnessing the collapse of advanced economies. In Japan, more adult diapers are sold than baby diapers, reflecting an inverted population pyramid with more old people than young. China faces a similar issue due to its now-defunct one-child policy. The only regions experiencing real population growth are Africa and the Middle East, which is problematic because global economies thrive when the young consume, and the old save. Economic Impact of Population Decline Young people drive demand in the economy. They buy cars, houses, appliances, and furniture. They travel, dine out, and essentially fuel economic growth. Older people, conversely, are more conservative in their spending, fearing they might outlive their savings. They don't drive economic growth and actually burden the economy due to higher medical costs. Modern pensions operate like giant Ponzi schemes. The young workers' contributions are immediately paid out to the elderly, rather than being saved and invested for future payouts. This misconception about pensions is a ticking time bomb. The Decline in Relationships and Birth Rates Why are people not getting into relationships or having babies? The answer lies in the influence of pornography and social media. Men seek sex, and women seek affirmation and resources. Traditionally, relationships were the medium through which these needs were met. Men exchanged resources for sex, and women exchanged sex for resources. The feminist revolution and the rise of social media have disrupted this exchange. The Feminist Revolution and Social Media's Impact Women now have more resources, partly due to their ability to monetize their beauty on social media platforms like OnlyFans. They gain both resources and affirmation without the risks associated with dating. Women face genuine physical danger in dating, knowing that men often seek casual hookups. For them, a first date is like the first stride in a marathon, daunting and less than exciting. Men, on the other hand, have turned to pornography to fulfill their sexual desires and need for variety. While it's not the perfect substitute for real relationships, it offers significant benefits. Men who marry early and start families often sacrifice both sex and variety quickly. Domestic responsibilities diminish the sexual flame, and single men find gratification and variety online. The Changing Dynamics of the Dating Market The feminist revolution has also led to women focusing more on their careers and less on family planning. The modern economy favors white-collar services where women excel, leaving many men behind. Women are hypergamous by nature, seeking men who are richer, taller, and of higher status. Despite their own resources, this biological need persists, shrinking the pool of dateable men. Consequently, men who recognize their demand leverage this to fulfill their desires for short-term encounters, leaving other men to resort to pornography. Conclusion: A Call to Reevaluate Our Priorities This shift in dynamics is neither good for men nor women. The decline in relationships and birth rates poses a significant threat to our societal structure and economic stability. It's crucial to reevaluate our priorities and find ways to foster meaningful relationships and family growth. Our survival as a species depends on it. In conclusion, relationships and reproduction are the bedrock of human existence. The decline in these areas, fueled by pornography, social media, and shifting societal roles, is jeopardizing our future. It's time to address these issues head-on and work towards a more balanced and sustainable approach to relationships and family life. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • Reclaiming Your Frame: Why Asking Permission in Relationships is Detrimental to Masculinity

    Have you ever found yourself puzzled by the need to ask permission when you're in a relationship? Picture this: you’re organizing a boys' night out, and inevitably, a few of the guys will respond with, "Let me ask my other half and get back to you." Why would a grown man need to ask permission for anything? Let me state for the record, I am not immune to this permission-asking phenomenon. In the cult sitcom Seinfeld , there’s a memorable scene where Kramer talks to Jerry about the downside of being married. He mentions having to ask permission to use the bathroom. While this might be taking some comedic license, there’s a kernel of truth in what Kramer says. He claims marriage is a man-made prison, and you’re doing time. Though extreme, many men find themselves in relationships where they are beholden to a partner who acts like a warden. This constant questioning and accounting for your time results in an unnecessary surrender of agency and authority. By succumbing to this authority, you are losing your frame. You’re stepping into her world – she’s not stepping into yours. Here’s the biggest irony: you are doing it to keep her happy, but the reality is the opposite. Most men comply with these demands to keep the peace, believing the old cliché that a happy wife leads to a happy life. There’s a meme that says when daddy ain’t happy, no one really cares, but when mommy ain’t happy, no one is happy. Let’s unpack this to understand why women make these demands and indirectly disrespect their men. These women are not operating in their feminine energy. Being controlling, domineering, and demanding are not naturally female traits; they are masculine. Women want to be protected and contained. They don’t want to be the protectors and the containers. But they are forced into this role when they perceive that the man cannot effectively perform this role. A power vacuum forces the woman to fill the role of the leader and the adored. Women do not feel comfortable in the role of the adored. They don’t like to be placed on a pedestal; they prefer to be the adorers. If you find yourself in a situation where you need to ask permission to go out with your friends, spend your own money, or are subjected to a range of inappropriate questions from your partner, the problem isn’t your partner, it’s you. You have not been successful in maintaining your frame, and you have stepped into her world. She has the power and is not operating in her traditional feminine role. You need to win back your frame, but this is easier said than done. Once the frame is lost, it is difficult to get it back. The genie is out of the bottle, but it’s not impossible. You need to rediscover your masculinity and regain your mastery. This often starts with self-mastery. Before you can become the master of your relationship, you need to master yourself – your emotions, your body, your finances. Reclaiming your frame means reclaiming your power and operating from a place of strength and leadership. It means stepping into your masculine energy and providing the protection and containment that your partner desires, even if she doesn’t realize it. By doing this, you create a dynamic where your partner can relax into her feminine energy, feeling secure and cherished. She no longer feels the need to control or dominate because she trusts in your ability to lead. And in turn, this brings balance and harmony to your relationship, creating a space where both partners can thrive in their natural roles. So, next time you find yourself needing to ask for permission, pause and reflect. Are you stepping into her world, or are you maintaining your frame? It’s time to reclaim your frame, rediscover your masculinity, and lead your relationship with confidence and authority. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • What Do Women Really Want in a Man?

    The age-old question, "What do women want in a man?" continues to spark debate and curiosity. Are women seeking a modern-day Christian Grey, a man who exudes danger and physical prowess—a towering lumberjack type dripping with masculinity, even if it’s seen as toxic by some? Or are they drawn to a softer, more emotionally in-tune partner, someone they can binge-watch "How to Make an American Quilt" with? The world seems split between these two extremes. The Dilemma of Extremes Intuitively, many might lean towards the latter—after all, popular culture often depicts the sensitive guy who writes poetry and knows how to crochet as the ideal partner. Yet, how often do we see movies where the leading man is a bit of a jerk, talks down to the heroine, but wins her heart through acts of bravery? He rides a Harley, lives hard, drinks hard—he’s the embodiment of Mickey Rourke in "Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man." The Influence of Feminism Is it possible that the narrative of the sensitive, poetry-writing man is a creation of feminist ideals, aimed at combating so-called toxic masculinity? Could it be another attempt to reshape male behavior in the ongoing feminist revolution? This is not to suggest that the feminist movement isn't one of the most significant and successful revolutions of the past 300 years—far more impactful than the French, Russian, and Chinese revolutions combined. However, like many revolutions, it seems to have reached a point where it may be seeking dominance rather than equality. The Pendulum Swing of Revolutions History shows us that revolutions often swing too far. The French Revolution's Robespierre met a bloody end when the quest for justice turned into a quest for power. Similarly, has the feminist movement shifted from seeking equal footing to seeking control over men? This is not a critique of feminism itself but a reflection on the natural progression of revolutionary movements. The Enduring Appeal of Rugged Masculinity Despite these cultural shifts, the desire for a rugged, masculine man who can protect, provide, and lead has not entirely vanished. The massive success of "Fifty Shades of Grey" is a testament to the enduring allure of the dominant male figure. Men would be wise to recognize that the fantasy of being led and dominated by a strong male presence is still very much alive in many women's minds. The Beast Within Jordan Peterson posits that women seek a beast they can tame, much like Beauty did in the classic fairy tale. This notion resonates with many, suggesting that deep down, the desire for a strong, protective, and somewhat wild partner is a primal instinct that hasn't been eradicated by modern societal changes. Conclusion In the end, what women want is complex and multifaceted, influenced by cultural narratives and personal preferences. While society may push for the sensitive, emotionally attuned man, the allure of the rugged, dominant protector remains strong. Understanding and balancing these dynamics can lead to more fulfilling and authentic relationships. Men should not be fooled into thinking that the desire for a strong, masculine figure has disappeared—it’s simply taken on new dimensions in the modern world. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • Why Being Too Agreeable is Hurting Your Relationship

    Many men, myself included, fall into the trap of being overly agreeable. This tendency can wreak havoc on relationships. But how does agreeableness manifest itself? It often means saying “yes” too frequently and “no” not enough. In relationships, we tend to acquiesce to our partner’s desires too often, always striving to give her what she wants. This, however, is far from ideal. Let me explain why. The Power Dynamics at Play If she always gets what she wants, she starts to feel more powerful than you, which can make her uncomfortable. You might wonder why this is problematic. After all, who doesn’t want to feel powerful? The answer lies in the inherent differences in how men and women perceive their physical safety. Understanding Vulnerability Women generally feel more physically vulnerable than men. Imagine gathering 100 men and 100 women in a room and asking how many felt their lives were threatened in the past month. Nearly all the women would raise their hands, compared to only a handful of men. For instance, consider a woman driving to work early in the morning. She pulls into an empty basement parking lot at 6 am. As she walks to the elevator, she’s likely looking over her shoulder, feeling anxious. A man in the same situation would be considerably less nervous. Women are constantly aware of threats to their physical safety, which makes them inherently more vulnerable. As her boyfriend or husband, your role is to create an environment where she can flourish, operating in her natural, feminine energy. The Flow State Think about the times when you lose track of time doing something you love—a sport, a hobby, or even a task at work. You’re in the zone, running on instinct, operating without overthinking. This flow state is effortless and enjoyable. The same applies to your partner. You want her to spend as much time in her natural energy as possible, engaging in activities that come naturally to her. This makes her happy and fulfilled. The Downside of Over-Acquiescing When you constantly accede to her wishes, you disrupt this flow state. You make her too powerful, pushing her out of her feminine energy and into a more masculine energy, where she doesn’t want to be. She wants to feel contained, protected, and provided for. Holding onto the power in the relationship is crucial. She wouldn’t have it any other way. Striking the Right Balance To foster a healthy relationship, it’s essential to strike a balance. Being too agreeable can upset the natural dynamic, making her feel uncomfortable and pushing her out of her feminine energy. Instead, maintain your own boundaries and assertiveness. This balance allows her to operate in her natural energy, fostering happiness and fulfillment for both of you. Conclusion Being overly agreeable can harm your relationship by upsetting the power dynamics and pushing your partner out of her natural, feminine energy. Striking a balance between accommodating her needs and maintaining your own boundaries is crucial. This balance allows both partners to flourish, fostering a healthier, happier relationship. Remember, holding onto your power doesn’t mean being domineering; it means creating a space where both you and your partner can thrive in your natural states. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • Redefining Masculinity: From Lone Wolf to Responsible Provider

    A common fallacy about masculinity is the image of the lone wolf—living off the land, chopping wood, hunting elk, making coats from bear skins, and building a log cabin. This romanticized notion suggests that true masculinity lies in rugged individualism and self-reliance. However, this image is misleading and incomplete. Consider the movie "The Revenant." The less glamorous side of this lifestyle is starkly depicted through the suffering of the lead character. This portrayal reveals a more accurate description of the so-called lone wolf's life: a constant battle for survival, marked by isolation and hardship. This is not the essence of masculinity. Many men today equate rugged individuality with the epitome of manhood. Yet, in doing so, they overlook a crucial element of masculinity: providing for others, contributing to the tribe, generating a surplus, being generous, having people depend on you, and fulfilling your obligations virtuously. The adage "no man is an island" underscores this. It suggests that isolating oneself makes one less of a man and perhaps represents the antithesis of true masculinity. In modern society, the phrase "men going their own way" is gaining traction on social media. This movement claims that men are making a high-quality decision by opting out of relationships, asserting that they have evaluated the pros and cons and concluded that the negatives outweigh the positives. They portray this choice as being made on their own terms, with a wealth of dating options at their disposal. However, data paints a different picture. It's not so much that men are choosing to opt out of the dating game; rather, they are being forced out due to factors beyond their control. They are simply not finding women who will date them. This situation is a crisis for men. Women are naturally hypergamous—they tend to date up, seeking partners who are richer, taller, and have higher social status. Decades into the feminist revolution, women are advancing rapidly, often outpacing men. More women are graduating from university, securing better jobs, and choosing to focus on building their businesses and advancing in the corporate world rather than starting families. As a result, the pool of dateable men for these successful women is shrinking. This leads to more men remaining single, not having sex, and not starting families. Consequently, they are unable to fulfill their roles as providers and protectors, essential components of their masculine duties. When men cannot fulfill these fundamentally masculine roles, they become less powerful. This situation leads to feelings of powerlessness, anxiety, depression, declining testosterone levels, and a general sense of directionlessness. This scenario is detrimental to both men and women. Men need to regain their masculinity and sense of purpose. The key to this lies in one word: responsibility. Taking responsibility means stepping up as providers and protectors, contributing to the well-being of others, and embracing their roles within the community. It is through responsibility that men can reclaim their power, find direction, and ultimately, redefine what it means to be a man in modern society. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • The Biggest Mistake Men Make When Getting into Relationships

    When men enter relationships without a clear plan or fail to align their actions with their intentions, they set themselves up for inevitable conflict and disappointment. So, what do most men want from women? The answer is often straightforward: sex. On the flip side, what do women want? Generally, they seek a long-term relationship. Herein lies the crux of the issue: men and women have fundamentally different goals when it comes to relationships, leading to significant challenges. The Diverging Goals of Men and Women Men typically approach relationships with a desire to keep things casual for as long as possible. They aren't necessarily searching for "the one"; their primary criterion might simply be that the woman is attractive and available. Women, on the other hand, often have a longer list of criteria and are typically seeking a partner for a long-term commitment. This divergence creates an inherent tension in many relationships. Honesty: The Best Policy? In an ideal world, men would be completely honest from the outset, openly stating that they are only interested in a casual relationship. However, in reality, this approach rarely works because most women, whether overtly or implicitly, make it clear that they are not just looking for casual fun. As a result, men often resort to playing their cards close to their chest. They focus on obtaining as much sexual gratification as possible while delaying the inevitable question: "Where is this going?" The Dreaded Question When this question arises, men find themselves in a tricky situation. How do you respond without revealing that your primary intention is casual sex? Up to this point, everything seems perfect: the sex is great, everyone is enjoying themselves, so why spoil it? This is where men’s strategy often falters. If men are only interested in sex, it is crucial for them to communicate this clearly and ensure that both parties are on the same page. The real trouble begins when men's actions do not align with their intentions. Actions Speak Louder Than Words While women are looking for commitment, arranging family introductions, and planning future homes, men need to be honest about their intentions. If a man's actions suggest he is ready for a commitment, but his plan is merely casual, he is not playing fair. When actions scream "commitment" but the intention is "sex only," it creates a misleading and ultimately hurtful situation. The Right Approach The best approach for men is to act in accordance with their plan. This means being honest from the start about their intentions and ensuring their actions do not lead to misunderstandings. If a man wants to keep things casual, he should avoid actions that imply a deeper commitment. In summary, the biggest mistake men make in relationships is not aligning their actions with their intentions. Honesty and transparency are crucial for avoiding misunderstandings and ensuring that both parties have a fulfilling and satisfying experience, whatever their goals may be. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

  • The Real Reason Men Choose the Wrong Women

    One of the most important decisions you'll ever make is who you choose as your romantic partner. This person can either elevate your life or drag you down. Your choice affects you emotionally, spiritually, and financially, and picking the wrong woman can cost you more than you're prepared to spend. Given the current divorce rates and the number of unhappily married men, it almost seems inevitable that you'll choose the wrong partner. So why do men struggle so much in this area? In this blog, we'll explore the reasons why men often fail in selecting the right partner. Reason 1: We Place Far Too Much Emphasis on Desire When you ask women what they want in a man, they usually have a long list: confidence, success, physical attractiveness, loyalty, humor, kindness, sensitivity, and the ability to provide and protect. Men, on the other hand, often only require that a woman is attractive and available. If a woman is attractive and makes herself sexually available, there’s almost nothing a man won’t do for her. This primal drive leads men to overlook red flags and enter into relationships for the wrong reasons. Men are driven by primal desires, striving for status to attract the most suitable mate—one who is young and beautiful because, in our caveman brains, these women are seen as the most fertile. This intense desire can make men blind, dumb, and deaf to potential issues. Men get into relationships primarily for sexual gratification, not long-term commitment, but their actions often send the opposite message. They ingratiate themselves with her family and friends, signaling a commitment they don’t truly feel. Over time, men develop a sense of loyalty to the person who provides them with sexual access. As desire wanes and red flags become more apparent, they find it difficult to end the relationship. It’s easier to stay together than face the pain of a breakup. By the time children enter the picture, men are deeply enmeshed in a relationship that started because the woman was attractive and available, leading to a lifetime commitment to the wrong person. Reason 2: We Opt for the Familiar Humans tend to prefer what’s familiar, even if it doesn’t serve their well-being. This often leads men to choose partners who mirror their early experiences, even if those experiences were negative. If you grew up in a less-than-affirming household, you might believe you don’t deserve a healthy, emotionally secure partner. Instead, you gravitate toward partners who create drama and emotional turmoil because that’s what you know. This behavior stems from childhood experiences where caregivers, who could do no wrong in a child’s eyes, may have been neglectful. The child assumes the problem lies with their own unworthiness, not with the caregiver. This flawed sense of self-worth carries into adulthood, leading men to choose partners who reflect their chaotic upbringing. They seek the familiar red flags because these are the devils they know and believe they deserve. Reason 3: Scarcity Mentality Men are often plagued by a scarcity mentality when it comes to women. This mentality may date back to our hunter-gatherer days when food scarcity was a constant threat. In today’s world, this has translated into a perceived scarcity of women. Women tend to date up, seeking men who are richer, taller, and have higher status. Historically, men had an advantage due to gender pay gaps and societal norms that excluded women from the workforce. However, the feminist revolution has changed this landscape. More women are graduating from universities and entering the workforce, narrowing the gender pay gap. Meanwhile, automation has replaced many blue-collar jobs, leaving many men behind. Hypergamy now works against men, as the pool of dateable men shrinks. Women are finding fewer suitable mates, leading to fewer hookups for both genders. Dating apps exacerbate this issue. Men, who generally find it harder to be alone, dominate these platforms, while women take their time to regroup after breakups. Consequently, women find only 10% of men on dating apps "dateable," while men find over 70% of women dateable. This scarcity mentality causes men to lower their standards and throw everything into any semi-decent match. High-value women are turned off by this neediness, leaving less emotionally mature women to accept these men, perpetuating a cycle of suboptimal relationships. Reason 4: Lack of Patience We live in an age of impatience. Instant gratification is the norm, from ordering taxis online to same-day delivery. This impatience extends to dating, where men rush into relationships without proper due diligence. By the second date, they expect to have slept with their partner; by the fifth date, they might declare their love, and within three months, they consider sharing keys to their apartment. This rush leads to decisions made during the "honeymoon" phase, blinding men to potential red flags. They end up enmeshed with women who may not share their values, dreams, or goals. The demand for instant gratification results in impulsive decisions with long-term negative consequences. Conclusion Men often choose the wrong women for reasons deeply rooted in desire, familiarity, scarcity mentality, and impatience. Understanding these tendencies is the first step towards making better choices in relationships. By being aware of these pitfalls, men can strive to find partners who truly align with their values and long-term goals, leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. #SelfCompassion   #BeKindToYourself   #PositiveSelfTalk   #ForgiveYourself   #SelfEsteem   #MentalHealth   #InnerDialogue   #SelfLove   #RealisticExpectations   #LifeBalance   #SelfGrowth   #EmbraceImperfection   #HumanFallibility   #RedefineSuccess   #HappinessOverHustle   #Mindfulness   #MentalWellbeing   #SelfAcceptance   #Kindness   #JourneyToSelfLove

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